Past

Ramai yang mengatakan hari-hari "kemeriahan" kini tidak semeriah dahulu.


Aku?


Sama macam dulu. Bagi aku itu lebih kepada mentaliti dari perkara fizikal. Tapi itu cerita kedai mamak.


Aku hanya ingin mengimbas kembali bulan puasa dahulu kala.


Alhamdulillah aku telah berpeluang berpuasa di luar negara. Di 2 negara asing. Tapi, seperti pengalaman-pengalaman yang lain, aku hanya menggunakan memori selektif. Seperti mana aku perlu bersahur di tengah malam akibat imsak pada 3 pagi atau berbuka pada 9 malam pada musim panas. Ini semuanya memori selektif.


Tapi ketika kecil dahulu, hari jadi aku banyak jatuh pada bulan yang mulia ini (ini mungkin sebab mengapa hari jadi aku tidak memberikan signifikasi yang lebih mendalam setiap tahun). Di Amerika misalnya, aku perlu bersahur pada tengah malam sebab imsak awal. Apabila di sekolah, aku hanya duduk diam di dalam kantin ketika rehat (salah satu perkara yang aku suka tentang Amerika, mereka mewajibkan berehat dikantin, dan kemudiannya memberi rehat yang sama panjang untuk berehat diluar.) Seperti kanak2 kecil dahulu, aku banyak meluangkan masa lapang aku di luar rumah. Bermain di padang, misalnya. Bulan puasa pun tidak berubah, aku tetap berlari-larian di dalam hutan seberang rumah aku dahulu. Bila balik ke rumah sudah pasti penat, dan rasa seksa tunggu buka pada 9 malam. Tapi aku sekarang lihat itu sebagai pengalaman.


Ketika aku berpuasa di tanah suci, kami sekeluarga membuka puasa di masjid. Mereka membentangkan kain putih dan menyediakan kurma, roti dan yogurt untuk kami berbuka. Selepas pulang dari sembahyang baru kami makan "berat".


Dan di sini pula, ia lebih bermakna kerana manusia-manusia disekeliling dunia aku. Ketika masih di bangku sekolah, kami pasti bermain bola di petang hari sebelum balik berbuka. Sehingga hari ini teknik dan cara bermain aku banyak diambil dari pengalaman bermain di dalam gelanggang tenis taman aku (the academy we called it). Malam pula lagi meriah, tapi itu cerita lain.


Sekarang, pada tika ini, banyak yang berubah dari fizikalnya, tapi signifikasinya masih sama. Tidak pernah lagi terlintas bahawa bulan puasa dan raya baru-baru ini tidak meriah. Mungkin aku naif. Mungkin aku tak dapat lihat. Atau mungkin aku terlampau selektif dalam memori.
Macam mana pun, kehidupan ini banyak blindspot. Kamu pilih blindspot yang betol?

Waste

Since I've got loads of work to do, I thought it would be an appropriate time to actually put a post up for the heck of it. The one thing I know how to do perfectly (I think) is to annoy people. Its like an art to me personally. Heck, I annoy myself most of the time.

To me there is certain degrees of how to annoy a person because of different personalities. Different people get annoyed by different things and I seemed to have mastered what those different things are whether it was consciously made or by accident.

There's also different levels of annoying. From the first slightly mild level of annoying that makes for some awkward giggles to the mother load of doucheyness, asshole. Then there is the angle of which the "attack" is made. Be it verbally, physically, subconsciously and other known specimen of movement.

At the end of the day having annoyed somebody deserves some kind of reward. Usually its in an edible form. Or drinkable. Sometimes its just the mere pleasure of knowing it happened with a cup of tea.

So,



care for a drink?

Kereta Laju

Watching hundreds of cars passing by,
I just stand still here,
at this spot,
this lane,
this way,
as cars pass by speedily,
awaiting the bus.
Knowing the inevitability that,
I will be in one of these cars.

First Step

Working productivity is not the priority of the day as we embarked on the holy month of Ramadan. The main priority I guess is self productivity in a holistic sense. Not to get too preachy so I'll just make this virtual toast, here's hoping for a good and wonderful time during the month of fasting.

There have been a lot of things I intended to write but now is not the time. A month++ to go. Come on!

Pandangan Pengalaman

I have lived in a semi-urban environment almost all my life. In touch with both the urban mindset and those rural areas?. So how has this affected my life in general? Well I think this has impacted to my ordinarism1 (if there was such a word). I have always thought of myself as the quintessential average person. I know not much of anything and not little of anything either which makes me generally average in terms of knowledge.

Where this then diverge is in my personality. I don't have an average personality in a general context. It has come to my attention that at an early age I saw things differently than most people because I take knowledge that's mainly general but on a different angle. In other words, a bulk of general information that is distributed evenly amongst us and I pick a different segment (an normally the most unpopular one at that!) than anyone else.

At school, most people in my class was there because 1. they were sent there by the school (or picked, whichever you see fit) and 2. they had a good idea of the science stream. I didn't have both except that's slightly untrue for the first one because I was sent to a science stream but doubtfully picked. Ha ha. I had a liking towards more factual medium such as history but I wasn't fully aware of it back then since I was trying to catch up on the "core" science subjects namely chemistry and add maths.

As I jab at making sense of everything I find that this piece of information is not particularly parallel with my big question of is passion for something give that much leverage in one's knowledge? Of course the general answer would be yes, but in a detailed look at things does this apply to everything else you have knowledge of especially those that are sprung from experiences? Do I know more about a bicycle after having the experience not only using it but also maintaining it without any passion behind it than just mere passion about it? Confusing? Good.

Esok Harga panadol naik! Ha ha ha. Supply and demand people..supply and demand...

It seems that there is no such word by using blogger's spellchecker [1]

We want you!

As I was reading away other people's blogs I wondered if any of us are influential. I mean apart from famous bloggers that are in the realm of celebrity (because we lack celebs in Malaysia) do you read another strangers blogs every once in awhile to get updated and sometimes get inspired? This does not count the bloggers whom you know and met in real life.

Blogs are mushrooming up like crazy this last decades especially in the last 3 to 5 years or so. Some are updated, some barely updated *cough cough*, and some just die in space. How influential can a certain blog be. This is a very valid question since the world wide web are advocates of freedom of speech and information. Nothing is impossible in the realm of the three w's.

If they are and your a blogger, do you feel burdened by the influence or at least aware of it? Most probably like most of us, you just don't give a damn because like I said before, blogs are mushrooming in numbers and perhaps most blogs become insignificant. They just become mere numbers in the statistics of the virtual world.

This is going nowhere. Ha ha.

A-ny-way, I was thinking of post themes like the tagged post, where people ask an x amount of question as a template and tag other people to do it (almost all blogs have 'em, almost). I thought about a different type of tag. Rather than an x amount of questions how about one question or word or object to theme your post regardless of your post format. Whether personal thoughts, short story, lyrics, poetry and so and so (you get the idea, I think).

To make it short, I'm proposing that we do a post on one particular album. (this is going to prove that 1. I'm seriously loosing my mind and 2. how much people actually read this space. Ha ha. Its a narcissistic thing.)

So, any ideas on a common album?

Imej

"Have you ever wondered how the realisation of your self image reflects your social environment especially where infatuation is concern?" tanya aku.

"Ha?" jawap kawan aku yang sedang memasukkan satu blok berbentuk bulat pada tempatnya bagaikan seorang air traffic controller membimbing kapal terbang mendarat dengan selamat.

"I mean, do you, as time goes by, perceive people differently depending on how you see yourself in the eyes of that person?" sambung aku lagi.

"Ha?" jawap kawan aku dalam kebingungan.

"Say you have a rating system based purely on looks. 10 being the highest while 1 is the lowest. You meet a person that at first you think is a 10 but when you realise that in her eyes your merely a 4 do you consciously lower your ratings towards her?" aku cuba bertanya dengan bantuan contoh.

"Milo." jawap si kawan aku.

"Milo?" kini aku kekeliruan.

Tapi sebelum aku bertanya akan signifikasi milo dalam konteks perbincangan ini, aku berfikir sendirian " Why the heck am I in a day care center."