A day out

Bright blue as if the ocean was above

the shine of the sun piercing through

I look down and adjusted my vision

and yet I could not take away it's glow

Her hair short and straight, enough, I guess

her eyes matched the sky, the ocean

her nose not long, not short

leads to the most beautiful smile.

As I look down further

bright line shine outwards

it soons becomes hazy, dizzying

as the color fades from its beauty

I placed my hands on her shoulder

I could sense that my grip was loosening
she turned away slowly as if it was in slow motion

my hands I saw only red

dripping itself down to the earth

I felt a throbbing pain coming from my chest

a sharp edge, deep, piercing

eyes slowly rolled upwards

now on my knees as I watch pavement come

Flashing lights

then darkness soon after

the streets sang loud

"I came to this world with nothing,

and I leave with nothing but love,

Everything else is just borrowed"


I am hoping this to be a new lease and an end to something that has been attached with me for far too long. Along with a song that I would think seems to be a tarantino like choice of song.

Nokhta

Perhaps only in death will you find life.

Why?

I dreamed that someday, at least for a few hours,

I get to know the answers to my questions.

The universe has its limitations. Mysterious to some, fucking complicated to others.

Headlines

If I told you everything you'd kill yourself,

If I told you something I'd kill myself,

If I told you nothing we'd kill the story.

Iceberg

Everything seems stable for now,

but deep down theres still doubt,

confusion, over analysis.

The rights to make things clear still hangs in the balance.

History

I've had my fair share of battle wounds,

some won, and some loss.

But now I don't know if I'm ready to loose this war.

I've got nothing to say, tonight.

Even if it means the sanity of my future.

Midnight Scare

In this dark place I sat mentally drained,

emotionally demolished,

physically tired.

And yet when I've tried to die,

I just wander back into that hole,

repeating it again and again.

Floating through limbo,

with nothing but anger, frustration, disbelief,

I cry in silence.

Who are you?

I just need the truth,

Who are you?

Power to the people

We are a nation that is one paycheck away from murder.

Kereta Laju

Watching hundreds of cars passing by,
I just stand still here,
at this spot,
this lane,
this way,
as cars pass by speedily,
awaiting the bus.
Knowing the inevitability that,
I will be in one of these cars.

Melampau

People can be dickheads sometimes.

Tembak

Sometimes I think that I have dug a hole so deep into the flaming volcanic core of the earth that I'm not able to get back up. I've dug myself too deep that I just want to take my P08 Parabellum and conjure up a new life.

I truly hope none of you out there have the chance to quote me on that.

Risk

When in doubt, flip a coin.

Privisi

When others are not applying and understanding your reasons, it is time to just shut the fuck up and lay back watching.

You can quote me on that.

Surat kosong

I know you kinda have problems with your internet connection right now and your probably going to miss this post unless you were soo bored that before you clicked on the archive button or older post button you scratched your fingers against the blackboard just to have a higher level of entertainment than this.

I'm here to make you feel like laughing (unintentionally of course), disgust, paranoid, nausea, and other symptoms that involved involuntary vomiting. I got you going now didn't I. Ha ha. So how long has it been? You say 1 and a half years, and I say because of the "life changes", so to speak, it was like a lifetime. Tom-ato, to-mato. (In that song British, American thing). I know, it had been that long. You were busy, I wasn't. When you weren't busy, I wasn't as well. Ha ha. I'm not sorry for disturbing you doing your work though. Ha ha. ( We're each others killjoy right?). I'm sticking to the fact that you are getting older you know. Which reminds me to ask you, why 18 anyway? Of all the numbers that could have been taken. You picked 18.

When I said I was a bit different than before, I sugar-coated it a bit didn't I. (I know, I know..Your saying, "A bit?! Really? A Bit?!). I blame it on responsibilities I tell ya. Too early to have 'em. Ha ha. At least I haven't lost my sense of humor right? And I see the same from you. After all, it is what makes us sane, right? Of course as usual had a blast even though it was slightly marred by an overdose of dairy on your part. Ha ha. ( I won't forget it as well ). To answer your question, yes I do think I have matured a bit over the last couple of years. It might be a bit surprising to know that I'm not stuck reading only comics anymore. Ha ha.

So anyway, I guess what I'm trying to say is that thank you for your time. Thank you for keeping me sane all these years. I'll try not to go missing again. Ha ha. As long as you always make me feel that home is home ( after everyone's departure into "adulthood". ) Your still no Peter Pan of young adult by the way. Ha ha. So thank you friend. Best friend.

I know, I know. Your gonna some how get all wound up about the sentimentality of the matter and that its all gdik..gdik.. Ha ha. Which I still don't know the exact definition to. Ha ha. I nose you too well la amoi. And vise versa. Ha ha.

Minggu Baru, Masalah Sama

Your life falls apart when your neglected. But you loose sight of real happiness and reality when your not. You don't know what you've got till its gone, again.